1. My hormones are out of control.
2. I had a hand in making my hormones go haywire.
3. I recently created some drama by giving a friend unsolicited advice. In return, I ended up taking things very personally (sensitive, much?) and stressing myself out, which wasn't necessarily worth it.
4. Because of unnecessary stress I could not function properly and ended up consuming only pecans and water yesterday.
5. My Yoga instructor was a firefighter - something that I wasn't necessarily pleased with. The room was already hot, but probably not hot for him. I mean, I get it. He carries around at least 40 pounds of equipment when he has to suit up and run into burning buildings, so a little temperature of 105 degrees plus humidity is probably comparable to a snow day.
6. I went to a friend's house where she saw me burst into tears for at least 10 minutes and listened to me ramble for 45 as I tried to make sense of my feelings about #3 (again, if my hormones were stable, none of this would have been a big deal).
I, however, was not enjoying my day playing in the snow. My practice was so horrible that the owner, an EXTREMELY pleasant woman who brings sunshine and rainbows wherever she walks, noticed that I was putting my flip flops on the wrong feet when I tried to leave. She always asks me if I'm okay at the end of practice, and usually I'll lie and say I'm fine, but my face gives everything away.
So she told me to sit down and relax. She also gave me a free electrolyte serum to drop in my water. I wanted to cry. Don't ask me why, but I think it's because I'm letting a lot of things occupy a lot of space in my brain. I suppose the one thing I'm grateful for is the fact that I'm not taking my pissy attitude out on anyone else. That's like a step in the right direction - or something.
Where was I going with this, anyway?
Oh yes. One of the instructors during my daily stints at Yoga told the class that everything is temporary. It's something that is very true, but it's something I have yet to figure out. I mean, if I were to suddenly end up with a baby, that wouldn't be temporary. That would be a permanent situation until the child turned 18 and I could shuffle him out of the house. I think the one thing that I'm learning is that friendships are temporary. My friend who I visited the other night (she's wonderful, I swear) gave me a good piece of advice: Why fight against a current when friendships go sour? Why try to salvage a relationship with someone who doesn't really care?
I think because it's in my nature to try to see the good in people. But that good? Sometimes only temporary. This sour mood? Temporary (I think).
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i was gonna post some cheesy lyrics (i.e. blue skies are gonna clear up or oh what a beautiful morning - shoutout oklahoma!) but it was even too cheesy for me.
ReplyDeleteinstead, i'm going to point out the positives in this post:
1. you are doing yoga. props to you. i wish i had the discipline.
2. you are staying hydrated. this is ALWAYS good. way to pee clear (too much? i'm sorry).
3. extremely nice yoga place owner lady looks out for you.
4. and she gave you some weird free vitamin thing for free. bonus!
5. you have a supergood friend that you were able to go to her house and cry and freak out and she likes you and gives you good advice. supergood friends like that - hard to come by.
6. you are emotional. i know, this might sound like a bad thing now, but seriously, being emotional is a good thing. because you feel things, you are passionate and compassionate. you are a good friend/person because of it. so what if you cry or feel too much sometimes? or if you are sensitive? i'd rather be sensitive than an ice queen on any day. and even more than that, i'd rather hang out with sensitive people.
7. you see the good in people. this is admirable.
8. karma may be a bitch, but she also rewards. and you have good karma coming at you.
9. your yoga instructor was a FIREFIGHTER?!?! hello pretty.
10. you still have a few weeks of summer left (jealous!). live it up. and you are wearing flip flops, so the weather is still flip flop weather, which is fantastic. go get some booze popsicles girl!
so out of that blog, i came up with 10 positive things. you are a rockstar, and hang in there. before you know it things will turn around!
hopefully i will get to see you in a few months. and we will eat cupcakes and free chips and salsa and pizza and be jolly (and if not, watch out, because i know how to stage a DAMN GOOD lifetime quality intervention).
You are completely and totally right :)
ReplyDeleteYesterday afternoon was so incredibly phenomenal after I read your comment(s). I am emotional. I can also be a bitch. There are some people who deserve my time and my friendship more than others. This is something that I'm still figuring out along the way.
Thank you :)
I found your blog through a blog through another blog, and I enjoy reading because you make me laugh. Just wanted to throw more positive "juju" in your direction. By reading your comment from your friend, you have even more kick butt friends out there who care about you and are ready to lift you up. I too, am emotional, and I agree that it works in your favor and against sometimes, but, alas...I would rather feel things than to be a monotonous blob. Keep your chin up!!
ReplyDelete